I miss you. I miss calling you on the phone to have a chat and yet I hear your voice in my ears all the time. I miss your big, warm embrace and yet I wrap myself up in the warmth of your beautiful crocheted blankets and I feel your love. I miss swapping stories about parenting and hearing you laugh as I tell you about all the funny things my boys are up to, knowing that it’s bringing you back so many good memories of when your own kids were so young. I miss sharing with you the projects I am working on and hearing your joy and pride that I pursued the craft that you taught me so many years ago. Most of all, I miss the wholeness of our family, the days when we were all together and we felt like it would go on forever. Losing you and Nick last year has, in some ways, made it seem like our family has unraveled. And I suppose, in some ways it has…but in so many ways we have been brought closer together, made stronger by our grief. We know that our lives are precious and that our time together is fleeting in the big picture of life…it’s not to be taken for granted.
I want you to know that so many people have been touched by your gracious, loving heart. Creating You Are Loved was a way for me to process my sadness and turn it into something that healed me and brought me joy. With every heart I have crocheted and sent out into the world (and by now it’s been hundreds) your love has been imprinted on each stitch. The happiness and gratitude that has been returned to me keeps me connected to you and gives me the motivation to keep making more hearts.
I think this is one project you would be most proud of. Thank you for being the guiding force that shepherds it forward and for keeping me doing what I love.
But…I still miss you. We all do.